We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize