We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
He shit in the fireplace
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Randomize
