My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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