Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Randomize
