how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Randomize
