maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
