doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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