i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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