in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
