I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
