Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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