I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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