need another drink. this is the easiest way
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize