like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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