so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize