new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
