Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
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