She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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