just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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