I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
