we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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