Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize
