Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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