So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize