No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
4 words: hood of his car
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
