Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Randomize
