I'd wear matching sweaters with you
I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
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