I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Sorry about my life...
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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