Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
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