I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize