I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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