When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize
