i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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