Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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