I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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