at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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