She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
