sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
