He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
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