is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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