There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Randomize
