Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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