yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
