Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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