I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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