I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
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