I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize