Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
