idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize