So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Randomize
