You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
