I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
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