i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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